Every day thankful for the opportunity to stay here in our friends beautiful house where we can recharge our batteries over the winter. Sometimes when looking at current situations or good events that are suddenly brought into ones existence, my first instinct is to think "damn we're lucky", but with a second thought, I always come to the same conclusion: You receive what you give. The energies you have sent out in the universe will always bounce back at you. Therefore is meditation and yoga or any training/exercise form that keeps you grounded, calm and focused very important in my eyes. Because it is when you are spiritually connected to your real self and have de-cluttered life that you can make the best decisions for yourself, and as a result, gain the collected thoughtfulness and time to be a better person to the ones around you. 

Since I for real started to get back to basics a few years ago, when I cut out a bunch of bad energies, worked on bringing myself to my most harmonic and settled version and aimed focus on what really is good for me, I have seen dramatic changes in how I respond to the outer world. And this is further improving for each day. It is also so very important to give oneself those quiet hours of solitude each week, because it is with non-distraction and utter peacefulness that we can fully reach the inner part of our soul where all love, energy and power is created.

Julianna Barwick's ambient, angelic music is something I can enjoy listening to when stretching and working on my yoga positions, this is her latest album. I also like this one from Lab's Cloud.

We live a few minutes walk from this beautiful stone beach. Calm evenings we can hear the waves crashing onto the shore from the porch of the house where we stay, so the presence of the sea is near even though we do not live right on the water just now. The area where we are housed this winter is very quiet and serene among all the greenery, but to be able to walk down to the ocean this swiftly, does gives life an additional dimension. 

On our previous walk to the beach, Alex and I were discussing what exactly it is with water and the sea that makes a soul feeling calm and satisfied. It is proven through studies that people (both wealthier and the one from socioeconomic communities) who live closer to the coast have reported better health, and I guess most of us who have ever lived near or on the water can agree on the fact that water has a soothing, relaxing effect on our wellbeing. In the city with unnatural noise and crowds, we tend to release more stress hormones, for which the sea offers the opposite effect. Coastal living is also proved to better encourage physical activity.

But what is it with the aquatic life that makes us feel at peace? Is it the never ending movement, the constant energy of the ever flowing water that feeds us with serotonin? The therapeutic dose of negative ions from the pounding wave energy that we inhale through the salty air. The way the sea keeps pushing and pushing, reminding us of that the world keeps moving around us. Or the relaxing sound of lapping waves which tends to lully our senses and which helps us reconnect with the reliable pattern of our own breathing.

Though it might be easy for many people to forget while they're busy living a modern, urbanized life - we human beings are grown out of, and we're part of the natural world. The nature which is made up of energies and natural molecular constellations. We are born and we still live in - no matter how far or close connected to it - a natural world with which we are interconnected as much as the plants, animals and the sea. That natural connection, a way for us to get back to where we come from and which offers us a chance to heal, is probably the most metaphorically beautiful thing with water and the ocean in my humble opinion. 

Congratulations to us, they say it's going to be an unusually cold winter here this year! Only six months till spring now, ha! Everyday's an adventure. I'm serious. Have you ever felt as if life were a complex strategy game with no stop button? A game we're forced to be part of and for which you are calmly supposed to analyze best directions and evaluate most profitable outcome, duck and dive for unexpected events and somehow straighten things out so not to fall too deep off the steep hills on each side of your path. 

That's how I feel most often, I'm one of seven billion game pieces patiently maneuvering my way through the vast board of life. It's a thought which in real life enables me to not take things too seriously as I know it's all a ploy anyway. That sounds cynical I know (and I haven't even got started on my beloved conspiracy theories), but I do gain great pleasure, comfort, as well as liberty in knowing that it's all going to move on whether I want it to or not. I can choose to tactically move with the game of life and with some distance to it all enjoy and reap from the moments, challenges and tests that are constantly thrown at me, or I could choose to fight against hardships and trials and make the way forward heavier than necessary. 

Life is like a game of chess, part luck - mostly strategy, the better we learn to master the game, the greater chance to lead a successful life. With successful I don't necessarily mean in terms of financial success from a career perspective, but in how much enjoyment, love and peace of mind that we gain along the way. For those are what are the most important to me in the end: to lead a healthy, pleasurable life where least time is spent on worrying, complaining and having regrets. Money is obviously an important aspect as it gives us freedom which in turn gives us satisfaction (if the satisfaction is true and spending under control), but I believe that when you work towards doing what you love and play the game of life with open mind and awareness, the rewards will inevitably find your way. One step at a time. Believe in the process. Learn from your mistakes. Have respect for life and its ups and downs and things will eventually work in your favor.

That said, I don't think there is a magic formula or a higher knowledge that can make any or every human being happy, successful and at peace for the rest of our lives as there are some events that can drastically transform our existence forever. Death, illness and injury for example. Those are all parts of the game too. Unfortunately perhaps, but still as much part of life as life itself. What I mean is merely that while we still have the physical ability to co-create our own lives, we should always choose that opportunity.

My current mantra goes something like this

EAT CLEAN - DRINK WATER -  WORK OUT - READ PLENTY - WRITE MORE - STAY FOCUSED - MEDITATE

There are several smaller as well as more profound goals with our staying on land and in order to achieve those, all clutter and non-necessities must be removed and avoided accordingly. Being an easily distracted person who on land often fall for temptations such as dining and wining and hanging out enjoying life rather than making use of my full potential in any other more important area, it is a gift from universe that we have been offered a quiet place to stay that is close enough to Boston (and NYC) for a well needed city break every once in a while. But far enough to make it a somewhat complicated and uneasy everyday/every week excursion. 

We literally live in the forest, ten minutes walk from the rugged shoreline. Our neighborhood is quiet and the only sounds surrounding us are the sweeping sound of wind drifting through the birch trees, birds singing, the occasional rain pouring down our windows and crickets and frogs playing their concerts in the evenings. 

For the same reason it has been good for my soul and mind to live on a boat and sail for such a long time that we have done. As nature, quiet peace and simple living seem to be the best elements to incorporate in ones life in order to reach deeper spiritual insights, as well as stay focused on what's good, and not only what is fun. 

We all have various shades in our personalities and we need a certain mixture and variation to feel fulfilled and content in life. The challenge, it seems, is to portion the different events and nuances in life in a comfortable yet progressive manner. I often look at life as its traits were positioned on a balance scale - pleasure, enjoyment and social events on one side. Achievements and work/spiritual progress on the other side. Both equally important as driving-forces in life where one doesn't work without the other, while excess of any given side puts us mentally, physically and spiritually off balance. 

We're very anxious to get moving. Hoping to have all solved by tomorrow. In the meanwhile we'd like to continue with the questions you had for us. This is a very good one: 

What, if anything, do you miss from your previous lives?

In the early process, when we still were in Barcelona preparing Alex's boat, excited to get started and leave our lives on land behind, we kind of blocked ourselves mentally, and directed focus only towards our new goal. Of course, that's what you do when wishing to be successful in whatever endeavor you set out upon. But in the moments of excitement, we in a way failed to see, or neglected to feel the beauty around us in the place where we had spent much time of our lives. We imagined life to become so much better and more free and wonderful, just by cutting the bowlines and disappear somewhere in the horizon. It was of course very relieving, incredibly exciting and we couldn't wait to get as far as possible from home. But slowly we started to realize that our past, and our previous lives and the people that were part of it, were more important molecules of who we were than what we at times wanted to admit. 

Our time here in the Caribbean hasn't been easy at all times, I'm sure you know that if you've read this blog. We've had our ups and downs in the relationship as a result of many challenges during the process of selling the old boat and readjusting to a life on the new one. It was hard to go through a total refit of the boat on low budget all the while living on it and both of us were working full time for almost a year. Alex with composite work on yachts in Antigua, me with the blog and all things around it. All that to gain security for us for the future. During this process, far from the security and comfort of "home" and the other people we love, we started to realize what exactly was missing, which parts of our souls that felt empty. Cause let's face it. One human can never have it all at the very same time. There will always be something one could add. Or remove for that matter. Neither of us would want to go through the hard year that we spent in Antigua again, yet we are both very thankful that it came and varnished, as the time taught us so much about ourselves. 

In our previous lives, neither Alex nor me have ever been the type of people who've been stuck somewhere for the security or comfort only. We've always lived very dynamic lives. Been traveling a lot and been living all over the world. Worked with all the things that we enjoyed. Just like we do right now, in a way a little different. But what has always been apparent in any of the earlier periods of our separate lives and what lacks here right now and did even more so during the hard year we've been through, are the people and friends that we always had around us in the past. The single hardest thing for us during these years on the seas has definitely been the lack of communication, connection and intimacy with our beloved friends, and family members too. 

Of course we've met with new acquaintances on the way, some even led to important and strong friendships and we're very thankful for those. And of course we've been in touch with our families and friends on email and skype and all that. But nothing measures up with real, old, human beings in flesh and bone. People who know you inside out and who loves you for who you are. People you have a history with. Though it occasionally is almost painful to not be near them, there certainly is a beauty in missing someone or something. Nostalgy paints a colorful picture that reveals the true side of who you are. You realize why you miss that special part with someone, or what exactly with those people that are important to you. What makes you feel good, what gives you energy and what has been valuable to you for many years of your life. 

I miss the simple things, they are what really matters. At least those are what matters to me, and Alex, and I think to most other human beings. For me, that is to be close to my sisters and hear them laugh. To share a couple bottles of wine, listen to music and talk rubbish with my friends all night long. To see their facial expressions when they're happy, excited or upset. To see my fathers proud countenance as he for once get to have all his five children collected by the dinner table. I miss the people I loved but who've passed away too soon. All these things that we can't pack a small sailboat full with and bring with us around the world, yet the memory of them are burnt into the mind forever. These memories become so clear and vivid once you are thousands of miles away from it all. The memories of our past are the things that gives us smiles and energy on the lonely nights at sea. Memories of people we've shared good times with. People who gave us something of real, profound value: Love, happiness, laughter, genuine moments, and good conversations. 

People often ask us "how do you two get along so well, living isolated for such a long time". And yes we still feel comfortable and happy in each others company despite having been in each others face day and night for two long years, and a third year in Bcn before that, but we aren't the only ones for each other and it's good to be aware of that fact. However much one might wish to imagine that when newly in love and the air is carrying the sense of nothing can ever come in between us - there is still always room for more than just your partner. Friends and family are the obvious, and the rooms for those are naturally a bit empty these days.

No complains here at all, we've chosen this and we love what we do and where we are. But I think it is important to sometimes go through moments of longer distance to your normal life, as that will teach you exactly what is of major importance to you, and you will more than ever learn what is not. I see myself a richer and in a way a more complete person now, as I know for sure what my heart is longing for.

The above screenshot is from a blog that I found when reading through the daily links that comes to our blog on the Internet. It's written by a Swedish blog reader and if I translate it to English it would go something like:

Jealous and bitter

This is a blog (link to our blog) that I'm reading sometimes, when I'm in the mood. It's written by a couple who seem to be crazy in love and they are very beautiful. It is almost like they don't exist. They have left the boring life at home and gone sailing, around the world.

So I'm reading, and am impressed by their drive. That they dared. That they had money to do it. And I'm dreaming away. And I get jealous, and bitter. Because they dared, because they had money to do it. Because I cannot.

Isn't that the worst thing that can happen to you? To be jealous and bitter, no one wants to be that way.

So I'm trying not to read their blog too often...

__________________________

Honestly, tears were burning behind my eyelids when I first read this. Not because I felt proud or honored. But because I in some weird way take it personally when people, women in particular, let themselves believe that they are not able to lead the lives they wish. Or when they compare themselves with others and let those comparisons bring them down and make them suffer when they absolutely don't have to. 

Anyone who knows me, knows that there is nothing, absolutely nothing, in this world that gets me fired up faster than when discussing a modern woman's right to choose a life for herself. Nothing makes me so upset than seeing a girl or a woman treat herself in ways that are destructive, stressful or cause anxiety just because she wants to fit in to a role or into something that someone else, media or society, and not herself, has created. I have fought with girlfriends as well as male-friends a thousand times because I've wanted them to be true to themselves, to take better care of their lives and respect the choices and freedom that they have, and to not let other people abuse them nor tell them what to do or not to. I have argued over and over with friends because they have accepted the minimum when they could, with the little tools we all got in our hands - willpower and a bit of focus - get so much more out of our short time we have on this earth. It is such a loaded and sensitive subject to me that I have even broken up with friends in the past because of their inability to stay true to themselves, and thus they've been fake, jealous and destructive to their surroundings as a result of the anxiety and low self-esteem that they've embraced and accepted as major parts of their lives. Neither of which I am interested in having to deal with in my life. Though the older I get, the more I understand that it is hard to help and change everyone, especially those who live deep down in denial, so I try to not get too personal nowadays. It is sometimes better to leave them alone and time will eventually give them more reasons to act. 

Not only have I met this type of mentality and thinking among friends and people I've met during my lifetime, but I have also written different personal blogs for the past seven years and have been in touch with tons of girls and women on a daily basis since 2005. Among many experiences and conclusions that I've made during these years, is that there is an incredible amount of people out there who suffer from anxiety of some sort. People who are confused, bitter, jealous, insecure or fight the wrong battles in life. I have received numerous emails and comments from girls out there who've asked me how I dared to 1.) Open my first own company at 21 2.) To move abroad and live in different parts of the world without close friends or family nearby 3.) Sail around the world 4.) Drop everything and every piece of security for the sake of wanderlust or curiosity 5.) Break up with a partner or a friend when I felt it didn't give me what I had hoped for etc etc. 

Many of these girls/women have expressed their fear of not measuring up, fear of being left alone, not choosing the right path or partner in life, not believing there is something better even though they might be miserable and the list goes on and on and on. And my answer has always been: Why spend time on fear or making excuses when all you need to do is to stop thinking so damn much, set a goal and work your way towards it? If I can do it, you can do it too. If you are capable of deciding that you should wake up 5.45 every single weekday morning to be on time at work at 7 am, you can also choose happiness before misery. It is that simple.

I understand that with the way that I have created this blog, beautiful photography and lots of fun things going on, it might appear as we live a fantastic life. And yes, it is a fantastic life indeed. Because that's what we wanted out of life and we won't settle for less. But it isn't fantastic all.the.time. No ones life is. We did also not get here out of luck nor because we had a lot of money on the bank. We are here because of two focused minds, hard and tiring work, persistence, willpower, many fights and disagreements and a chain of many different choices and coincidences, good and bad, made earlier in life. 

If you read the blog carefully, you will easily see that we have the same problems like everyone else has, just that we do not choose to make them bigger than what they actually are. Alex and I argue about stupid things, we have gone through a relationship crisis and are luckily on the other side of that (first one?). We have loads of work that occupies us and hinders us occasionally from being as free as we would want to. And the money that we got when we sold everything we owned before we left on this journey, they are long gone in the process. We miss our friends and families a lot, and even if we have each other, it does occasionally feel very lonely to live the way we do. We are no perfect human beings neither of us. Both of us have some things with ourselves (and each other!) that we are not perfectly happy with, but we choose to focus on the good things instead of ranting about what we don't have. 

To give you some more information. Neither Alex nor me come from perfectly conventional family backgrounds. Both of us have lived most parts of our lives without some of the most important people in a human beings life. Alex without his biological father, me without my mother. Although we have got good help and guidance along the way from family members and other people who have loved and cared for us, we both have had to work and support ourselves earlier than most others. Our unconventional backgrounds have brought us close to the real side of life and of course we could have chosen to give up and feel sorry for ourselves at many occasions along the way, but instead we have meticulously fought our way forward. Instead of letting fear or anxiety take over our existence, we have since the very early years decided that if something's going to happen here, we better take care of it ourselves. I talk a lot in we-terms when I speak about these things, and it is because if there's one thing Alex and I are similar in, it is exactly this. 

One of my best friends has recently decided that she wanted to quit smoking and she told me some parts of the book which will help her to get over the ten year old addiction. In the book, the author explains, not how to fight against the addiction, but how to change your mindset. You know that smoking is not good for you, so instead of feeling sorry for yourself and fighting the fact that you can't smoke those wonderful cigarettes again, you must brainwash yourself into the realistic understanding that smoking is not for you. Because you do not want to be a slave to something so destructive for yourself. Instead of making it a big deal, you need to simplify and just get over it. Just quit and don't look back. This is the same change of attitude that I always come back to when I speak about a human beings mental wellbeing. Be realistic. Don't overdramatize the change. A change is not definite nor is it dangerous. If you know that you're not happy with whatever you are doing, then just take a deep breath, make a plan and set yourself free. Don't fuss over it. Don't make excuses. Don't try to feed your illusions and do stay focused on what you really want out of your life. And if you do want to make it difficult and continue to lie to yourself, go ahead and make another excuse, but don't come and cry over misery, boredom or anxiety again. You want a change in your life? So it's about time you stand up for who you are, what you want and just get the hell out there and make things happen. 

Before someone comes with an objection, you must understand that I do only talk to the ones of you who desperately are longing for a change of some sort. The ones who dream and long for a change but haven't yet began their new journey. I do not talk to the ones of you who are half/half happy and already accepted that your life is, more or less, OK. Cause you have already decided, right? So do not take what I say personally. 

Without getting too deep into spirituality and affirmations again, but we all should know by now that what you project, is what you get back in return. If you feed your brain with thoughts and feelings of hopelessness, jealousy, anxiety and bitterness, that is where you will stay until you learn better. But if you instead teach yourself that it is fully normal to dream big and fight for what your gut tells you is right, that is the direction your life will be heading. Life is not easy for anyone of us. We all have to go through our own individual hardships and challenges. That's another fact. So with that in mind, why not take the bull by the horns and let the challenges at least bring yourself towards a workable, positive goal. And we all must stop being afraid for disappointments and failure. Personally I love a bit of pain and struggle in some sick kind of way, as I know that it will teach me another important lesson. And if I fail, so what? I have no time to be afraid of failure as that would stop my personal growth. It is our society and people around us who have taught us to be scared of failure. But you don't have to buy into any of that shit, do you understand that?

If I use myself and my younger me as an example: I have not always known exactly what I wanted to do in life, nor with who or where I would live. Those things were always secondary to me. My focus was more of the sort one finds within oneself. The things that always drove me, was the will to become a strong, confident, experienced, stable, genuine and independent woman. Later on, I also promised myself that I'd never settle for any man or friend or relationship that didn't fill my life with genuine love, respect and happiness. All else can get the fuck out of my view, literally. I thank my Grandmother for planting the seeds of strength and independence into my brain. But most of it all, I thank myself for always staying true to my fundamental beliefs and for not compromising on my core values. If anyone comes in to my world and tries to mess up with my beliefs or my feelings, I will gladly show you the door. My life is my life and no one is in charge of it except me.

I have experimented with tons of things in my thirty year old life as I wanted to get to know myself completely and learn what I really wanted out of my time on this planet. Not what people around me, what society, magazines or hollywood movies suggested me to become. But who I was deep within when I was the driver of my own destiny. I've worked for many different companies in many areas and industries to gain experience and learn, mostly, what I did not want to do. I've also worked many years for myself which I eventually found suited me better. I have made a lot of money but I have also been terribly broke at times. I have loved many people and I've left some of them behind. I've spent longer times living with different friends or partners but I have also loved the times I was alone. I have enjoyed and indulged in what life has on offer in every way and dimension imaginable but I have also failed and stumbled hundreds of times. Do I regret any of my experiences? Of course not, not even the bad or the sad ones, as they have made me the full and complex person that I am today. When I had the possibility, I have always traveled. I wanted to see the world and get to know as many cultures, different mindsets and point of views' as I could, as a chance to learn something new. I saw my journeys around the world as an opportunity to grab the best of what I found so that I could construct my own life where I truthfully felt in peace, happiness and harmony. I have gone through many different stages of love, despair, longing, pain, excitement, fear, genuine happiness, sorrow and thrills in one big massive roller coaster. What my experiences have given me, are far greater than any external thing or illusionary projection one could've so intelligently build up around oneself. My life: the good, the bad, the confrontations, joys and struggles that I've been through have made me just what I was dreaming about since I was a young girl. A strong, confident, experienced, stable, genuine and independent woman. And the prove of that is in all what I get back from the world and the wonderful loving people that I have had and have the pleasure to share my life with. 

Let me use a metaphor from a part of Alex's life as another good example. Alex had a dream of owning a classic yacht. A fast, gorgeous sailboat which would fit for our lifestyle yet be safe and strong and take us around the world in safety and good style. Now, I mentioned already that we do not have much savings left and we consider ourselves more poor than rich in terms of money, but that didn't stop him from making his dream a reality. He wanted the best and wouldn't settle for less. So he sold his well equipped, super safe and strong boat, the one we started our journey in. To be able to get what he was dreaming about, which is this very boat that we live and travel in today. He couldn't afford buying a well maintained classic yacht in the size that we needed, so this was the closest we could get. This boat is an old, modern classic racing sailboat and built by one of the more famous sailboat designers (Halsey Herreshoff), though it had been literally abandoned for the past ten years or so. Even when Alex, and not to mention me, saw the devastating amount of job that he would have to initiate, he still refused to look another way. He saw the great potential under the dust of this yacht and he dared to dream beyond the mess that he had put himself into. And now we are here, almost a year later and the boat is steadily getting back to the beautiful standard that she once were in, if not better. What I wanted to say with all of this is that the change to the better didn't come for free. Alex has been working on this boat from eight in the morning till sometimes midnight in order to make his dream come true. He had a vision of what would make him and us happy and he stuck to it. He saw no other option than to go through the sweaty, hard work, day and night, seven days a week, just to get to where we are today. The option of staying with a boat that made him unhappy was nonexistent. The worst thing he could have done to himself, would have been to accept the safety, comfort and the risk-free situation of staying with the boat that we had before.

I think that one of the worst disfavors you can do to yourself, is to limit your personal growth or potential happiness because of fear or because of all the other excuses that people tend to do on a daily basis. If you want something so bad, there ain't going to be no one but you stopping it. And if you do continue to make excuses or hindering your own development, I can only take it as that you simply didn't want it bad enough. 

Not everyone wants to sail around the world like we do which I fully understand, but the mindset I've been rambling about for the past thirty minutes (for a lifetime?) can be applied to all things in life. You are the master of your own life. Make sure to respect and nurture that very gift the best you can. I would also never ever accept myself being jealous or bitter, as I know that I don't have to and because I much rather spend that precious time on fulfilling my own, personal dreams, and not only someone else's.

Many bikini shots here lately, my sincere apologies for that.. 

 

And compare it with the image at the top. I have not been exercising like a freak during this journey if that's what you think. No the change comes rather from leading a much healthier life than what I was used to. You really don't need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that with 300% less alcohol in your system each month, this transformation is easily obtained. 

I think I've started practicing yoga in every city I've ever lived, only to realize, after a few sessions, that I didn't have the patience nor "time" for it. Of course I understood the meaning and purpose of the training, just that I was too "busy" to learn how to slow down or how to breath correctly. I remember I was always wondering when the class would finish so that I could get out calling that important phone call or meet up with some friends for drinks. And a few seasons later, I tried it again, but I simply wasn't ready to slow down, until now. 

One of the main reasons to why I wanted to leave everything behind and sail around the world with Alex, was because I had come to a turning point in life where I felt the need to cut out the things that didn't really matter in the long run. I was also anxious to take a distance to the regular world, as an opportunity to begin looking inward. True that I've always been a spiritually inclined person, but my life was rushing too fast. Too many unnecessary challenges, way too much alcohol, late nights and I was leading a physically destructive lifestyle rather than a healthy one. Without consciously knowing that I needed to better take care of myself, I quickly suggested to Alex that we should set ourselves free and sail the oceans of the world together. For many other reasons too of course, much for the love and affection that we felt for one another, a chance to get closer to each other and to build a foundation for the love we were willing to invest in, but one of my personal reasons was that my body and soul was yearning for a change. A change that would allow me to grow as a human being.

Having been out sailing now for almost two years, thousands of miles away from the jetset-life I was accustomed to back home in Europe and around the world, one thing that has now grown to be more important than anything in my life, is to be able to breath freely, to lead a slower, harmonic life and to properly take care of my body. The body is after all what carries our soul and without constant attention to it we might loose contact with our inner spirit. That disconnection is something I've experienced much in my past, a distance to my Self that sometimes made me make wrong decisions as well as treating myself and others in ways that hasn't always been the best ones. 

So as a natural progress, I started practicing yoga again a few months back. Combined with my daily exercise and meditation, which I've been busy with ever since we left Europe behind, it allows my body and soul to be at peace with my being. Not only does it give my body the flexibility and strength that is good to have when sailing and leading a very physically challenging life as we do, but it also puts my mind at ease. It gives me strength and ability to, with a clear and conscious mind, make better decisions. It opens up my soul, makes me less affected by outer disturbances and distractions. It allows me to breath and analyze situations before rushing with answers and thus giving me time and opportunity to act better. Decide better. Do better. Live better. And evidently, to be a better partner, friend, human being than what I might've been before. Not saying I was ever terrible at any of those, just that there's always room for improvements within ourselves and I'm glad that I've found my way to achieve a greater form of inner peace and fulfillment. Which naturally reflects on the people I meet, those that I invite into my sphere and the people that I share my life with. 

Ultimately, life is just a series of actions and reactions, and we can choose if we want to make that chain a positive or a negative one. To keep myself in good shape, spiritually and physically, makes my little chain in this big world a better and more harmonic one. It really is so easy, and though I'm endlessly thankful for the vast experiences my earlier life has given me, I regret that I didn't fully embrace this knowledge before. Never too old for improvements though.

When people ask what's our main purpose, the real drive behind sailing the world and living a life like this, the answer that always comes to mind is, because we want to feel free. However egoistic or selfish that might sound, it's all very simple, we just want that: to feel free, have peace of mind. We have no huge saving-the-world-mission going on here nor are we out on this journey just because "it's a fun thing to have done", but what is driving us are all those unnecessary things one might have to face in a normal life. 

We don't want no stress, we want no bigger problems than the ones we manage to create for ourselves, we don't want anyone interfering with our time on earth, no one telling us what to do and what not to. We want to be able to do the things we love, design the life the way we feel like. We want to share beautiful moments only with people we love being around and the ones that we feel happy and comfortable with. We want to see the world with our own eyes, maybe finding a place to settle for a few years or continue to search for that perfect place for years to come if that suits us better for that time being. 

This journey we're out on is the best way we've found to achieve all of that. This is the only way we have figured out that gives us real peace of mind and we are willing to work hard each of these days in various locations around the world to maintain this liberating lifestyle that we have chosen as our best bet. Don't get me wrong now, we have a lot of things to do here, a lot of work and projects to take care of which sometimes means 14 hours of non-stop work and a lot of sweat and pain, but we're doing it all because we have chosen it as parts of our life, and obviously because money doesn't grow on palm trees..

Life is so incredibly beautiful if we manage it well so we simply just don't want to waste our time if you know what I mean. To be egoistic and to take control of your own life is for us the best way to live as that gives not only happiness to oneself, but also to the people that you choose to be around. I am more humble and thoughtful to my family and people that I care about today than what I have ever been before, while at the same time being more distant to what consume too much of my energy in a negative way, and it all comes down to the same philosophy: Life was made to be lived in peaceful and harmonic manners. When the mind and soul is in peace because you do only the things you enjoy doing, the things that moves you forward and when you surround yourself only with the energy you feel balanced with - that is for me to have found freedom. 

And that is in the end of the day, the reason why we have chosen to live the way we do. Some weeks we're broke and dirty as a result of expensive and time consuming boat renovations and not much work for us as freelancers', other weeks we're tidied up with pockets full of cash but all the time we're on our way towards our own dreams. Living the life we have chosen for ourselves. Since we began this journey and discovered the truth of it, both the good the bad and the ugly sides, neither of us can imagine living life differently. Everyday thankful that we made this dream reality.

Was about time that I got to show Alex my home country which we both enjoyed very much, but we always seem to miss our little boat whenever we're away for too long. Although she's currently a big mess with things and tools all over the place, nothing beats the feeling of being home. I am still, two years after I moved aboard a boat with Alex, amazed at how easy it was to adapt to a life in confined spaces on water. Tight, hot, not always so comfortable, currently no functioning water heater, not always enough electricity to charge the laptop, not quite enough space for all the belongings we wish to have with us - yet still this is where we feel most satisfied. Strange? Maybe, but there simply is something utterly fulfilling with being unattached in the way that you are when you have only yourself to rely on. Only the thought of that we can turn the engine key or hoist the sails any second and change location to almost wherever in the world, gives such incredible sense of independence, which I believe most of us are yearning for in one way or the other. 

Sometimes we look back and reflect upon the fact that we left a slightly more normal way of living to live aboard a small sailboat far from most of our families and friends, and even though life occasionally can be hard in the way we have chosen to live it, we still think this was the right way to go. There are many more dreams waiting for us to fulfill and every step, every deck fitting we re-bed, every new winch that is getting installed, every hour of work in front of the computer, every argument we've gone through and every hour of organizing inside of the boat is just taking us one step closer to those dreams. It is amazing how almost everything that we do in our everyday lives nowadays are intentionally or unconsciously connected to those dreams and it is pleasing to know that we have the power to make reality of them all. With a focused mind and a mutual understanding for the goal and the process, I sincerely believe we all can make our own miracles come true.